A very well written post by Jane Brown showed up this morning in Adoptive Families Circle addressing a variety of ways that are obvious regarding race in the mind of a child growing up with parents who differ in appearance to it.

Here is what I contributed to the discussion:

This is another great post.

Race is first and foremost on the mind of a child who looks different to the adoptive parents. Such children create their own coping mechanisms without the help of their White parents; they are typically not present when issues among their peers (or insensitive adults for that matter) arise. It is not a matter of parental love or lack thereof. It is a given that parents love their children, and adopted children love their parents. After all, they know what side the bread is buttered on.

I was a very racist child. I observed people of all colors, and not only the color was important as far I was concerned. I noticed obvious differences in hair and skin, but also in the shape of feet, hands, fingers, long or short necks. I wanted to be White, like my adoptive family and the White community I associated in. I am still observant this day, but have given up being judgmental. However, issues of identity can at times still creep up and be confusing.

What is surprising, is that no one knew I felt as I did, and no one realized I was as conflicted as I was. My parents did everything in their power to shield me from the cruelty of the racist world; when I came to the US, I learned that being Black was way more than just having dark skin. The political ramifications were mind-boggling to me who had lived in Latin America as a child and in Europe through young adulthood.

Things these days are a lot easier with regard to exchange of information. I am truly pleased at the way this site, and sites similar to this one, offer the opportunity for open discussions about every imaginable issue associated with cross-cultural upbringing. But race is indeed an essential topic. The sense of cultural supremacy continues to reamin well-rooted within the culture of the White world.